As we acknowledged in our last blog, resistance to change when facing important decisions and transitions is only human. We all experience some form and degree of resistance, especially as leaders who increasingly recognize the importance of facilitating truly lasting, impactful diversity, equity and inclusion (DEI) initiatives. This is a huge responsibility, after all, with the wellbeing of staff and success of organizations hanging in the balance.

Strong Leaders Start With Assessing Themselves

What distinguishes a strong inclusive leader is purposefully lowering your natural defenses and becoming mindful of your own tendencies. Honest, compassionate self- appraisal grants you personal awareness while also allowing you to be attuned to attitudes and behaviors coming similarly from fellow leaders, staff, or Board members. From there, you can reach out authentically to others, helping them to feel seen while also modeling and establishing accountability for necessary change. In short, you can lead powerfully and effectively.

Resistance is a discomforting emotion that is often nuanced and elusive. It is difficult to pinpoint, so we end up letting it stay undercover, hidden from our conscious awareness. We disguise it in unfulfilled but well-intentioned aspirations. We cloud it in carefully reasoned, logically-sound objections (excuses!?)—we clearly don’t have enough time, or money, or people to get it done right! But, because resistance is an emotion, it can be felt and, when unresolved, it tends to haunt us.

Name That Resistance!

As an elusive emotion, resistance can play endless tricks on us. Resistance will get under our skin with countless unspoken messages that blindside us and hinder our motivations and undermine our accomplishments. Recognizing and naming these behaviors will help you win the battle with it. Here are some specific telltale signs I regularly identify, and directly hear, when coaching leaders, even those who are sincerely committed to becoming more inclusive.

Rationalizing: “We have other priorities, we don’t have the time, we don’t have the money, we don’t have the expertise, we don’t have the [name the resource]. Focusing on this could derail us from our goals and ultimately from our mission.”

Minimizing: “Sure, we could have more diversity in our teams, but we’re not doing so bad. After all, we have some women and people of color on staff.”

Denial: (The writing is on the wall but on one is reading it). “Yes, in the last month we did lose three employees from underrepresented groups but, it has nothing to do with race, age, gender. . . .”

Pandering to the lower common denominator: Someone may suggest a change to make your workplace more inclusive, but you fail to take action because you’re afraid the change will upset customers or staff members who are not in favor of it.

This means we are broken: There is an assumption that doing DEI work means that we are doing something wrong in the first place. Instead of seeing DEI work as a sign of development and growth, we see it as an approach to repairing a mechanistic problem. We fail to recognize that in order to help employees grow into the strongest, healthier version of themselves, we need to start seeing our organizations as ever-changing spaces for employees to evolve.

Justification: “We just can’t find qualified people to diversify our team. We’ve tried everything, but we can’t seem to recruit them! And, retaining them is also a problem.”

Procrastinating: Putting things off until it becomes a catastrophe.

Feigning Ignorance: “We don’t know what we don’t know.”

Fragility: You know some staff (or even yourself) become easily triggered, angered, and defensive when issues of racism, sexism, and heterosexism are framed as equity pain points in your organizational culture. It feels better to ignore it and seemingly avoid conflict and keep the peace.

Noticing You’re Stuck is the Way Out

How many of these examples resonate for you? Whether your answer is one or all, you’ve passed an important test! As difficult as it can feel to deal with resistance, the amazing thing is that it’s a necessary catalyst for change. Acknowledging and beginning to identify resistance behaviors means you’re ready to move forward in your leadership development and to carry your organization with you on the promising and fulfilling journey of finally following through on your commitment to equity and inclusion.